Tools for Mentoring Young Teens

This is geared toward a male teen that I am mentoring currently, but feel free to modify it. I kept it pretty general and at the same time pretty direct.

Things You Should Know Now

1. Learn to think for yourself
a. Often times we let our friends or culture tell us what we should think or believe – be sure that you do your own research and to not take anything at face value unless it comes from a very reliable source.
2. Be Grounded
a. Mentally – Do you ever struggle with depression? Highs and Lows?
b. Spiritually – Do you have a church? Do you know where you will go when you die? Do you believe in Heaven/Hell?
c. Emotionally – How are your relationships? How do you react when you are upset?
d. Financially – Are you saving your money and spending wisely?
e. Physically – are you taking care of your body? Your teeth?
3. Sex
a. Sex is a gift and should be treated as something special between two people that are married.
b. Culture, television and media will try to devalue sex and make it something that is recreational and that should be done like dancing or playing sports. But it is much more emotional and physical and dangerous.
4. Pornography
a. Is addictive
b. Will subtract – not add from your physical relationships
c. Can be a destructive trap that keeps you from living in reality and leave you always wanting more than what is actually possible.
5. Drugs and Alcohol
a. Even after you are 21 there is a large emphasis on using alcohol to have a good time. It really isn’t necessary and can become a crutch for some people.
b. Alcohol, like many things in life, can be fun, but becomes dangerous when people are stupid
c. Drugs are illegal and addictive – but you probably already know this! The point is sometimes it is more fun to do them because they are illegal, but they will really only limit you from reaching your goals
6. Dream Big
a. Things rarely just happen, if you want something, take small steps to get there and eventually you will.

7. Failure teaches us more than Success
a. When we fail it means we are really challenging ourselves. If you win all the time you aren’t getting any better, you aren’t growing and you will become lazy and arrogant all the while your competition is getting stronger
8. Don’t limit yourself or allow other to limit you
a. If you want to try something, try it, don’t let fear hold you back
b. Be constantly looking for new opportunities to excel
9. Be Humble
a. No one likes arrogant people
b. Know the difference between confidence and arrogance

10. Be Unselfish
a. It really is much better to give than to receive
b. Participate in your community, give back, help others
c. Life can be depressing if all we focus on is our own wants and needs. Real fulfillment comes from helping others.