Categories
Funny God

Happy, Happy, Happy

I have to admit, I just started watching Duck Dynasty this year. It is in it’s second season and I was skeptical at first, but it’s just funny. I always appreciated the prayers at the end of the show, but lots of people pray over big meals – it doesn’t mean they believe in Jesus. It may just mean that’s what they did as kids and so it became a family tradition. It’s cool to see Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty sharing his story of faith in Jesus.

You can buy his new book here.

Categories
Funny Relationships

Mr. and Mrs. Chanc Gomez – Upgrade 2009

“I’ve known Chanc since before he was even born and so I’ve seen him go through a lot of women…”

This is a shortened version of my impromptu toast that I made at my cousin Chanc’s wedding reception last night. The best men were his brothers but they are a little microphone shy so Chanc asked me to step in and give it a whirl. I had this great speech planned out where I was going to say that Chanc knew how to pick good girls and he had a good head on his shoulders and he was a great father, but instead I made him sound like some sort of womanizer that was finally settling down.

You should have seen everyone’s faces when I said, “I’ve seen him go through a lot of women”. For a moment there was stunned silence, a look of shock on Jen and Chanc’s faces, and then a roar of laughter. I was embarrassed, but it was all said in love and meant to be a compliment. Sometimes the best toasts are the ones where something inappropriate is said.

Another snafu that happened with me was during the ceremony before I was supposed to sing I started walking up to the stage too early. As a groomsman I was at the end of the row of guys and I thought the minister was looking at me and telling me to go up to the podium when in reality she was looking at something else entirely. I slunk right back to my spot and then when it was finally my turn to sing I went up and thankfully sang without any glitches.

My favorite part of the entire weekend was just getting to spend quality time with my family. I love getting to see Aunt Becky and all of the Gomez’s and Chanc and I have always been close, but it is rare that I get to spend the weekend with my two cousin’s Kidd and Tony and I really enjoyed getting to hang with them a bit. We danced the night away at the reception and just got stupid on the dance floor doing all sorts of dancing. Obviously the Gomez family inherited my dancing ability because all of them can dance – especially Tony, which was quite a surprise. All those boys are super talented in one way or another and I’m proud of them.

Another great thing about weddings is getting to hang out with the fellas. Chanc has some great friends and it was cool getting to know some of them and spending time with some that I already knew.

The weekend was a blast, weddings are always great and I’m very excited to have Jen as part of the family. Chanc definitely upgraded – cue Beyonce…. let me upgrade ya.

And on a fun wedding note, you MUST watch this video…

Categories
Funny

Talk About A Downer on Your Male Ego

Man can’t even steal a woman’s purse… that big sissy. This is about 3 miles from my house in a nice neighborhood. This intersection houses a Barnes and Noble, Bed Bath and Beyond and a Michaels. The woman was probably going into Michaels to get a Bedazzler and would not be thwarted!

CRIME WATCH BULLETIN
PLANO POLICE DEPARTMENT

The following event was reported to the Plano Police Department.

OFFENSE NUMBER: 2009-139073
OFFENSE TYPE: Attempted Robbery
LOCATION/STREET: W. 15th Street (15th Street/Alma Drive, Mapsco 658S)
BLOCK NUMBER: 900
DATE:7/10/09 (Friday) TIME: 12:30pm

DESCRIPTION: The female victim was approached on a retail store parking lot by the suspect.  The suspect attempted to steal the victim’s purse and run away with it.  The victim fought him off and he left in the 1995 Toyota.

SUSPECT INFORMATION: White male in his 40’s; 5’8”, 165 lbs, small build, blondish brown hair, last seen wearing blue jean shorts and a sleeveless white t-shirt.

VEHICLE INFORMATION: 1995 Toyota 2 door, partial Texas license plate #Y16-YR?.

MD/kr

If you have any information regarding suspicious persons or activity in your area, please call the Plano Police Department at (972) 424-5678.
Attention Area Coordinator:  It is your responsibility to pass this information to your Block Captains.

Categories
Funny

Enjoying

http://thisiswhyyourefat.com/

Unbelievable.

Categories
Funny

Alec Baldwin Therapy

Therapy Jack style. This is by far some of the funniest 30 Rock stuff. Alec is absolutely brilliant!