Culture God Grad School

Where is Your Identity?

My first semester at DTS I took a Spiritual Life class with Dr. Ralston. It was amazing. I took the class online and the great thing about that was we could get a transcript of the lectures. I took this snippet from one of the lectures as it changed my life and the way I thought about my ministry. I share it today because I believe it is always good to do some self-examination and find out what our true motives are when we are doing ministry.

“One of the biggest shadows inside a lot of leaders is the deep insecurity about their own identity, their own worth. The insecurity is hard to see in extraverted people, but the extraversion is often there precisely because they’re insecure about who they are. They are trying to prove themselves in the external world rather than wrestling with their inner identity.”

Macintosh comments, “The majority of tragically fallen Christian leaders during the past 10 to 15 years have been baby boomers who felt driven to achieve and succeed in an increasingly competitive and demanding church environment. Most often their ambition has been a subtle and dangerous combination of their own dysfunctional personal needs. In a certain measure of altruistic desire to expand the kingdom of God, however, because ambition is easily disguised in Christian circles and couched in spiritual language, for example the need to fulfill the Great Commission and expand the church, the dysfunctions that drive Christian leaders often go undetected and unchallenged until it is too late. A paradox of sorts existed in the lives of most of the leaders who experience significant failures. The personal insecurities, feeling of inferiority, and the need for parental approval among other dysfunctions that compel these people to become successful leaders were very often the same issues that precipitated their failure.”

You see what people are doing in Christian leadership? They’re trying to compensate. They’re trying to get the affirmation, the security, and the significance; they’re prostituting the role to their own needs. When leaders operate with a deep unexamined insecurity about their own identity, they create institutional settings that deprive other people of their identity as a way of dealing with the unexamined fears in the leaders themselves, and leaders not only embed in their organizations what they intend unconsciously to get across, but they also convey their inner conflicts and the inconsistencies in their own personal natures.

Human beings have always employed an enormous variety of clever devices for running away from themselves. We can keep ourselves so busy, fill our lives with so many diversions, stuff our heads with so much knowledge, involve ourselves with so many people, and cover so much ground that we never have time to probe the fearful and wonderful world within, and by middle life most of us are accomplished fugitives from ourselves; see the issues?” – Dr. Ralston, Dallas Theological Seminary

Grad School

Accepted to DTS!

Two days ago I found out that I got accepted to DTS. This is exciting for so many reasons.

1. I never thought I’d go to seminary and figured it was only for pastors or missionaries
2. I’m finally going to school for something I really want to do.
3. I’m going for a Masters in Media and Communication
4. One of my classes is Creative Writing!
5. I hope to one day work for a church doing Audio, Video and Web & Graphic design

For the last year I’ve been supporting myself with Web and Graphic design and I finally realized that this is something I’m good at and that I love. I used to kind of think of myself as a “Hack” that could put together some nice graphics, but not great graphics. Well, without any schooling at all I’ve landed multiple jobs and I’ve made a lot of money and so I decided to give up the “I’m not that good” act and just start really pursuing this career path.

God made me creative – actually, he made us all creative, I think we just don’t realize our own creativity. Some of us approach problems in creative ways that lead to brilliant solutions while others may build things with their hands or organize things well. Just because it’s not a piece of art doesn’t mean that you aren’t creative. If we are all created in the image of God then I think we all have some of his creativity – some just tap into it easier than others.

So here I am at 34 working for a church, doing web & graphic design and living back in Denton, TX near all my friends and family. It is a great feeling to be doing exactly what you love and I’m honored that I get to be part of such a great educational institution like DTS to further my career and creativity all while learning more about God. Does it get any better? I don’t think so.

In His Grip,


Grad School Recipes

Bed and Breakfast Quiche with a side of Stress

This morning I got up and baked enough quiche for 30 people. I decided to make a simple quiche lorraine and sausage potato quiche. I’ve never made quiche before and so I Googled “Breakfast Quiche Recipes” and found some good ones.

Needless to say, the Sausage Potato quiche was my favorite. Filled with eggs, cottage cheese, colby jack and big bag of hashbrowns – it was less eggy than most quiches. It’s topped with crumbled sausage – which was actually my idea, the recipe called for bacon but the Quiche Lorraine had bacon in it and so I decided on sausage.

Unfortunately, our meeting at work that I was cooking all this food for was at 9:00 a.m. I got up at 6 and started working on the food and was barely done by 8:15. Quiche takes 45 minutes to cook and on top of that I had cinnamon and blueberry rolls to bake as well.

Not only was I in charge of food for the quarterly department meeting, I was also in charge of the slides, introducing each presenter and making the slides look amazing. I pulled it all off flawlessly, but when it was over I was so exhausted that I took a half day off.

The half day off was used to study for a mid-term exam for a mini-mester that I am taking in Graduate Level financial accounting. Blech.

Since this recipe was so dang delicious I thought I would share the recipe with you. Everyone at work loved it as well.

Bacon and Potato Quiche presented by Gilead’s on the Lake Bed & Breakfast 

5 eggs
1/2 bag unthawed Potatoes O’Brien
2 cups Monterey Jack/Colby Cheese divided
10 slices cooked & crumbled bacon
1 cup cottage cheese
Couple sprinkles garlic salt
Beat 5 eggs in a bowl. Sprinkle in some garlic salt (to taste) and then add Potatoes O’Brien, cottage cheese, and 1 cup Monterey Jack/Colby. Beat until nice and smooth by hand. Pour into lightly buttered Quiche dish and bake at 375 degrees for 35 minutes. Remove from oven. Put 1 cup Monterey Jack/Colby cheese on top and the 10 slices of cooked crumbled bacon on top of the cheese. Cook 5 more minutes until the cheese is melted.

Note: Cheddar Cheese may be used in place of the Monterey Jack/Colby Cheese

Grad School

Would You, Could You, With a Goat?

Would You, Could You, In a boat?

I do not like Financial Accounting 101
I do not like it, it isn’t fun.

How about in a class, sitting on your big fat butt?

I do not like it in a class, or on my butt
I do not like it in a rut.

How about on a white board,
Sitting next to Christ our Lord?

Not next to Christ, not next to God
Not in a school, or a school of Cod.

I do not like Accounting 101
I do not like it, it isn’t fun.

Would you try it on the web?
Would you try it with Governor Jeb?

Not with Jeb or on the web
I will not try it, Ed just said.

How bout in a cat or a catamaran?
Or in a car with Uncle Sam?

Not in a cat, nor catamaran, or uncle Sam
Not even with a side of green eggs and ham?

How bout with an Indian Professor
Or maybe with the Barefoot Contessa?

Well maybe with the Barefoot Contessa,
And maybe with an Indian Professa.

It seems I do like Financial Accounting 101
It’s not so bad, it can be fun
I like the debits and credits too
I do like them and so would you!