Dear Walmart

March 25, 2009 |  by  |  I'm Just Sayin  |  Share

I love you for always being consistent, but I hate you for your expansive parking lot that always seems to be filled with cars, wild people and shopping carts.

Today I visited you in Waco and I couldn’t help but think about how about 90% of your store was filled with useless junk that people don’t really need but purchase because we have money to burn or at least credit cards to fill with debt and so we purchase and consume away.

I love capitalism as much as the next guy but I can’t appreciate an uneducated shopper who fills his basket with cheap items that cost 1/3 the price of something that is higher quality but lasts about 10% as long. It’s simple math, besides, that mdf particle board furniture should have been outlawed a long time ago.

Thanks also Walmart for having a McDonalds in your store so that I can eat crap while I shop for crap. It’s a win win if I am in a contest to be overweight and broke with a house full of trash.

Don’t get me wrong Walmart, on occasion you provide some great deals and for many average consumers you provide products that they otherwise couldn’t afford, but do they really need an oversized picture of Betty Boop framed for just $29.99? Or how about those candles that smell bad and burn up in just a few short hours? And what about your shoes that are made out of plastic and cardboard? If a pair made out of leather costs 6 dollars to produce, how much do these things cost?

As I said before I am a fan of capitalism, survival of the fittest and all that jazz and that is why I choose Target. Sure it might cost a little more but I don’t have to deal with all the crap to get what I really need.


3 Comments


  1. We go to Walmart sometimes cuz they do tend to be cheaper (not on everything) but when we go I dread it. I hate parking, walking in, walking down the aisles and checking out I enjoy my trips to Target though. Yay Target!

  2. I kinda like Walmart. But I LOVE Target.

  3. Eddie:
    You never cease to make me laugh. Love the Walmart letter – and I totally agree with you.
    Just wanted to make sure Chanc talked to you. We want you to sing at our wedding. However, I need you to be thinking of a song that you would like to sing. Chanc doesn’t want me to know what it is. One of my friends will also be singing as well. And, I need to know what your sister’s addresses are!!! I can’t get them an invite if I don’t have their address. Can’t wait to see you – and Chanc told you that you are a groomsman too right??? I’m just double-checking.
    Miss you!
    Jen

Leave a Reply