• Just had some killer steaks off the grill, sweet corn on the cob, zucchini, and some watermelon! #
• Still in Minnesota eating at PUNCH a gourmet pizza place – delish, not so nutrish. #
• At the Mall of America!! #
• About to enjoy an Andes Mint Caribou Cooler frozen coffee drink. #
• In the airport, just upgraded to first class on an already free flight home. Awesome trip! Thanks Holst Family! #
• Listening to: Baby’s Romance by Chris Garneau as well as some Cold War Kids and Cookie Jar by Gym Class Heroes. #

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I already miss you a little bit.

I’m sitting at home after a 3 day trip to see a Kanakuk friend – Eric Holst. We only spent a summer together 9 years ago, but as anyone from Kanakuk can tell you that Kanakuk is a place that bonds people together forever no matter how far the distance or time.

I had read on Eric’s facebook post one morning that he was eating blueberry muffins and drinking Spunky Monkey Coffee. I left a comment that said something like, “I wish I was there…” without missing a beat, Eric responded with, “You should come down for a visit.”

That is really all it takes for me, within a few days we had it planned. I was to come down for the Minnesota State Fair on a weekend that everyone had off and so i did.

On Friday I arrived and dropped off my bags at their apartment at Bethel University and then promptly went to the State Fair. As soon as we got inside we stopped for a Pronto Pup which is like a corn dog but instead of corn meal they use flour. I devoured one quickly smothered in ketchup and mustard. We started to walk away and I said, “Um, guys, would you look down on me if I got another one of those right now?”  They laughed and said, “No Way!” The Pronto Pup is called “A banquet on a stick.” I laughed at that title at first, but after I had one I agreed. They were delicious.

Later that day I consumed a turkey leg, a malt, a chocolate covered pretzel, a large quantity of fries, a 32 ounce root beer, one fried green tomato, and at the end of the day we bought a bucket of warm chocolate chip cookies and then walked over to the stand where they have all-you-can-drink milk for just a buck. I got one glass, then went back and bought another glass so I would have two cups and then i got two more refills and so I overindulged with 5 glasses of milk and way too many cookies. It was heaven.

The next morning I couldn’t believe I was actually hungry.  When I woke up and went into the kitchen Eric was cooking eggs, bacon, and blueberry pancakes as well as some fresh brewed coffee. I was really surprised to see him so effortlessly cooking all of this food. I like to cook and I have never seen another man that enjoyed cooking as much, if not more, than I do.

After breakfast we went to a cool sculpture garden and walked around for a bit. We climbed on some sculptures even though there were signs that said, “Please do not climb on the sculptures” everywhere. Like big kids we played and then we went out for an AMAZING lunch of bacon cheeseburgers, fries and malts at a place called “The Convention Grill”.

After feasting at the grill we went to see the Minnehaha Waterfall and even waded into the creek. The water was really cold at first but after a while it became quite pleasant. On the way to Minnehaha Falls we drove by these beautiful homes that had so much character that I started to fall in love with Minnesota. However, Eric and Nikki said that the temperature in the winter averages around 16 degrees for 3 months straight and that alone will keep me from ever being a resident of the lovely state.

Saturday’s dinner consisted of some grilled steaks, squash, sweet corn and watermelon. We ate outside on picnic tables that were near a beautiful lake.  After dinner we sat in the iving room and talked and then eventually watched the movie 21.

Sunday was a simple continental breakfast of toast with peanut butter and honey, fresh peaches and watermelon and some more great coffee.

We went to church and then for lunch we went to this wonderful gourmet pizza place and had delicious pizza and a piping hot artichoke dip. After lunch it was off to the Mall of America – the largest mall in the U.S.A and then finally back to the airport where it was time to return home.

The entire trip was a good time. Eric and Nikki have two cute kids that are 2.5 and almost 4 years of age. They were fun little chatterboxes that kept things lively and I couldn’t help but think that Wyatt was cute even when he was throwing a fit.

I told Eric that out of all my weekend excursions that this one had moved to the top of the list for “The Most Fun in a little over 48 hours award”.  I was serious, I mean, we packed so much fun, good conversation, and great food into such a short amount of time that they quickly moved to the top of the list.  Not that there really is a list, but if there was…

So on the way home to round out the great trip I spent the 90 bucks to upgrade to first class. No one was sitting beside me and the two hour flight home could not have been more enjoyable.

Thanks Eric and Nikki for a great weekend, i hope to come back someday soon! (After the freezing cold… for sure)

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• Eating this monstrous bucket of warm chocolate chip cookies. Now on to the unlimited milk for just a buck!! #
• I never want to see another warm cookie again!!! #
• Turkey legs taste great but they are always so much work once you get past the easy to eat meat. Plus, they cost 8 bucks. #
• Currently at the Alene Grossman flower gardens in Minnesota. Very pretty. #
• Now at Walker on the Green Artist designed mini golf course. Very cool. #
• Just left this really cool waterfall and park area where we waded in the water. #
• Whoa, that Convention Grill rocked my face clean off. Great Burgers, fries and an Oreo Shake! Rachel Ray would have said Yummo!! #

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• Wee airport security! #
• I am in Minnesota!! It is like 70 degrees here and sunny!! #
• What is the difference between a parasol and an umbrella? Anyone want to enlighten me? #
• At the Fair and this girl just walked by in stilettos and shorts like this is some sort of club and Pop, Lock and drop it is about to play. #

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• It is way past my dinner time – should I bail on class and go get food? Sounds like a great bad idea! #
• Wow. I really AM tall. All these foreign students look like the cast for Smurfs the brown 2008 edition. #
• Man at the booth across from me sporting a bluetooth headset and he looks about 80 if he is a day. I love tech savy octogenarians! #
• “The iTunes store is temporarily unavailable.” What? I want this Regina Spektor song RIGHT NOW!!! #

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Would You, Could You, In a boat?

I do not like Financial Accounting 101
I do not like it, it isn’t fun.

How about in a class, sitting on your big fat butt?

I do not like it in a class, or on my butt
I do not like it in a rut.

How about on a white board,
Sitting next to Christ our Lord?

Not next to Christ, not next to God
Not in a school, or a school of Cod.

I do not like Accounting 101
I do not like it, it isn’t fun.

Would you try it on the web?
Would you try it with Governor Jeb?

Not with Jeb or on the web
I will not try it, Ed just said.

How bout in a cat or a catamaran?
Or in a car with Uncle Sam?

Not in a cat, nor catamaran, or uncle Sam
Not even with a side of green eggs and ham?

How bout with an Indian Professor
Or maybe with the Barefoot Contessa?

Well maybe with the Barefoot Contessa,
And maybe with an Indian Professa.

It seems I do like Financial Accounting 101
It’s not so bad, it can be fun
I like the debits and credits too
I do like them and so would you!

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Have you heard of Mark Driscoll? He started a church in Seattle that has now grown to 7,000 people. I don’t normally get excited about mega Church’s, but I like what Driscoll is selling and I’m buying it!

This is not a clip or Vintage Jesus, this is a clip called Macho Man, check it out…

Rencently Hudson Productions released an awesomely produced study called Vintage Jesus. I’ve never seen a video series like it and if you want to get a quick preview then check out www.songofsolomon.com.

What I like about Mark Driscoll is how real he is and with the way our world is now days I think sometimes its necessary not to beat around the bush.  Check out this Youtube video entitled Biblical Oral Sex…

I don’t know about you, but I’m scouring Youtube and listening to all of his snippets. I also recently read a piece of one of his books A Radical Reformission: Reaching Out Without Selling Out and it was hilarious and funny. I was so skeptical at first because I rarely like faith-based non-fiction, but this book was actually something right up my alley.

So go now to www.songofsolomon.com and pick up a copy of Vintage Jesus.
 

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If you are in this area and you are looking for a great personal trainer, I recommend Pamela Micks. She does Kettlebell Classes as well as 1:1 fitness sessions. She actually competes in fitness competitions and is fun to train with.

Real Body Fitness

Pamela Micks
Certified Personal Trainer
214-536-3304
pamela@realbodyfitness.com

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• The all-you-can-eat Chinese Buffet always sounds so good and then afterwards I want to commit suicide to put myself out of my misery. #

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It looks like for the next few months I am going to be going to DBC again. That’s the plan as of right now. I love that church and I think I want to go back there to get my feet wet, maybe do a few skits, teach the kids how to do a Dance-Off, maybe have a Project Design contest against each grade (Because that building needs some jazzing up) and then I’ll leave and start my own church that features a carnival like atmosphere complete with booths and hot dogs and candy apples.

Wait, I got carried away there for a moment – you know what I mean.

For real though, this feels right and I am excited to get to work with Chris Wilson and to learn from his experience and share mine as well.

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“Get your hands off of me you two-balled bitch!” Greg screamed at our neighbor Valerie as she pulled him off of her nephew Bobby.  Greg and Bobby had been in a heated brawl where many punches were thrown but very few landed.

Valerie’s white Chevy truck was parked in the middle of the gravel road and you could see the creek on both sides. My sisters and I watched in amazement, first the fight and then the adult/juvenile confrontation. We rarely heard cussing and this was the first time I had ever heard insults directed with such venom, creativity and alliteration. I was mesmerized mostly because Greg was only 1 year older than me and at 9 years of age I had never seen a child defy an adult both physcially and verbally.

Greg slapped at Valerie but she was a very large woman and his attempts to inflict pain were as futile as bee stinging a rock.  Eventually Greg calmed down once he realized that this wasn’t a battle he was going to win. He got on his bike and rode up the hill towards his own house and Bobby road off in the opposite direction to his house. Valerie got in her car following slowly behind Greg. The rest of us kids stood around talking wildly about the incident, gasping as we recalled the language and Greg’s passionate antics.

Corrida Lane was long gravel road that started at a bend in the road at the bottom of a hill. The decline continued toward the creek which is where we lived and eventually turned into a dead end near the Delgado’s, a Mexican family of 7 or 8.  Across the street from our house there was a small trailer and our friends Ricky and Kelly lived there. The land was cheap in this area, you could get two acres for a payment of only 90 dollars a month and there weren’t any restrictions as to how you lived on your piece of America – which was evident by the appearance of the homes and the junk that surrounded them.

The Delgado’s lived in a mobile home that eventually got reposessed and so they built a one bedroom shack that housed all 8 of them, but right across the street was Bobby’s house and it was a nice two story custom home that made all of the other homes on the street look like crack houses.

Life on Corrida was simple and ucomplicated. We made friends with everyone, event the foul-mouthed Greg. Eventually Greg and I became “best” friends which meant that during the summer we hung out with each other, but during the school year he tried to avoid me most of the time because I was a Christian.

This little fact has made my life miserable, but not as much as it has made it happy…

We became Christian’s at the age of 5, 6, and 7. My parents followed suit soon thereafter. We were one of those families that did everything the Bible said to do and my parents, whose lives before had been a series of mini-hell’s, suddenly found purpose and meaning in their chaotic lives. It was like a new drug, a delicious, sweet cure-all that they couldn’t get enough of.

Being a Christian wasn’t easy. It meant giving up almost all music, going to church every Sunday and at one point it meant giving up our Christmas tree and even our television. My parents listened to Talk Back with Bob Larson and our church, Word of Faith, had a pastor that believed in miracles and demons and the rapture.

This was my world. Jesus was the center of my universe and every single action that I did was checked with the thought, “Is this wrong?”

I had been led to believe at an early age that if you committed a sin and hadn’t repented before you died or Jesus returned then you would go to hell. God was looking for a church that was white as snow and spot and blemish free.

At night I would pray for forgiveness when I laid my head on my pillow. Every single lie or bad thought that I could remember I would confess and repent hoping that God would see my heart and my fear.

That is what early Christianity was for me, a series of rules and a boat load of fear. I’ve never heard Jonathan Edwards’ sermon, “Sinner’s in the hands of an angry God”, I didn’t need to, I understood full well his wrath and I knew that ever day I was teetering on the brink of hell and damnation.

Talk Back with Bob Larson was a radio program where Bob Larson would talk on the radio to people who were involved in Satanic cults. There were some people that would call in and claim to be demon possessed and sometimes crazy things would happen where their would be crazy voices or dead silence and we’d all be in the car listening and terrified.

One caller called in and said that there was a green eye on her bedroom wall and she felt like it was a demon watching her at night. Another woman called in and retold a story of hour her parents were devil worhsippers and how they killed people and ate their flesh raw. They would sacrifice people and then throw their bodies into a pit. If she didn’t do what she was supposed to she would be thrown into the pit with the dead and decaying bodies, sometimes for days at a time.

Others called in with various stories and soon I started to believe that there were demons in our house and eventually there were.

There is a song by Gavin DeGraw called “Belief” and in it there is a line that says, “Belief makes things real.” When I was younger I didn’t understand the power of belief, but I do now. I truly believe that there are powers of good and evil in this world and that if you toy with darkness, if you feed on supernatural things, then you open a door to them and allow them a modicum of control around you.

While living in The Colony, TX we were new Christians and we listened to Bob Larson and other preachers talk of demons and we allowed ourselves to be consumed with the possibility that there was a demon in our house and it wasn’t long before we started seeing manifestations of something. The occasional and unexplained slammed door, lights going off and on, dogs barking at imaginery things – it was very real at the time and very frightening.

Over the years that fear stayed with me. All of my life I have woke in the middle of the night sometimes sensing a presence and wondering if my room was filled with something demonic. I’ve rarely shared any of my fears because most people would think them absurd. They make fun of me when I tell them I don’t like scary movies and they say things like, “It isn’t real, it’s just a movie” but to me it is often very real. It is a horror that will live with me and visit at the most unsuspecting times, waking me at night and reminding me of the terror of my youth.

There is something about being alone in the dark in the middle of the night when you awake from a particularly vivid dream. The images will stay with you, your heart will race and you are afraid. The next morning when you awake the fear is gone as if the light of day has chased away the demons, but during the night it was so real, so thick you could feel it, you could touch it.

Greg was one of my first “friends” that truly helped me to see how different I was from everyone else. As a Christian you really do stand apart. I faced many things in my childhood and no matter how difficult I was always reminded that there were some people who gave their lives for the sake of Christ. My persecution was nothing compared to what Christ suffered on the cross, what I didn’t know then was that most of the time I suffered needlessly and that my Faith was only one more item on a long list of reasons to torment me.

Looking back I can’t help but wish that my parents had used a little bit more discretion when it came to talk of demons and demon posession. I realize that they were just trying to make me aware of the harsh realities that exist in our world, but perhaps they should have waited until I was a little older than 5 years old.

When I look back on my childhood I can see a recurring theme that I have only now realized, that theme is Fear.

Author’s Note: I realize that this post is a bit incongruous, but I’ll fix that later and possibly break this up into two chapters. For now I am going to leave it as is.

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• accidentally enrolled for the 2nd session of grad school when I need the first session! Ugh. Hope they can change it. #
• I’m taking a half day and I want a Dr. Pepper. The two aren’t related, but neither are Jennifer Lopez and Mario Lopez. #
• I am dying for a fruit smoothie. But I am at home and it’s the maids day off. #

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