Tweets for 2008-07-16

  • A question for Evolutionists: Why is it that colors in nature never clash? #
  • I no longer use mileage for distance, now I say – “Dallas is 20 dollars that way, or Denton is 26 dollars North of here.” #
  • Starbucks has the worst pastries! When a 350 pund man is never tempted by a case full of sweet selections – it’s time to upgrade! #
  • Is it the sign of an eating disorder if you think about lunch while you are eating breakfast? #
  • Sales girl: Why don’t you take care of your nails? Me: because I am a guy. #
  • Sales girl: look at your nail after I have bushed and polished it, what does it look like? Me in my head: looks disconcertingly feminine. #
  • Note to Self: when spraying commercial strength hornet spray, do not spray against wind and do not inhale. Stupid self. #
  • Watching “Milk Money” – whatever happened to Melanie Griffith? #

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