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Into the Fire

“That’s it, now your shakra’s are aligned, hold for 5… 4… 3… 2…1… beautiful.” I hardly thought I looked beautiful. My tree pose hardly looked like a tree and more like a bush. A round 6′ 5″ 330lb bush. 

Angie, our instructor, continued to walk around the room. There was an ounce of body fat on her, if found by a pack of cannibals they would starve to death. Her sweet voice carried throughout the room that was quickly escalating way beyond the 98.6 degree temperatures that were stated on the class description. We all prepared to get into corpse pose only I was sure mine wasn’t going to just be a pose.

I looked over at my sister, yep, still alive but barely. She mouthed the words, “I hate you.” as we rolled over, climbed up on our knees and went into cow pose. Now this was a pose I was more familiar with. A couple of deep breaths and we were back in corpse pose.  Like piles of beef jerky being dehydrated we sat there, drenched in our own sodium and electrolytes.  I needed to get out of this hot room. An hour and a half later we made our escape to the fresh 70 degree temperatures outside which felt more like 50.  I was weak and light-headed, but alive.

Tonight I go back for round 2… should be fun.

By Evan Stark

Eddie Renz is an avid fan of Egyptology, Wilbur Smith and bacon. Not a fan of humility but often finds himself humbled when he is around people who understand numbers like the Fibonacci sequence and Pi.

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