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Hygeine Movie Reviews

Superbad… and the title should have clued me in.

Last night a friend and I went to the movies. It was my second night to go to the movies, which use to be normal for me, but now that I have a house I don’t really seem to have much time to do anything other than “house stuff”.

So I asked Josh, “What do you want to see?” and he said, “Superbad”. I told him I didn’t want to see it and then later I told him that I did want to see it because the reviews (The ones I heard on TV that should never be trusted) were really good. That should have been my second clue.

As I sat there watching and in the first 15 minutes they start to talk about porn casually and what monthly subscription to purchase and using every sexual word imaginable I knew that I had made a mistake. The good angel on my right shoulder told me that I needed to walk out, but the lazy demon on my left told me that it was probably going to get better and that I could ignore the crass humor and let it slide.

After 2 ours of hearing the F word about 300 times, the D word no less than 400 times, and the V word more times than any other movie or gynecologist has ever uttered in his entire career I once again told myself that I should leave – but I didn’t. I sat there laughing on occasion and being grateful that I hadn’t paid for the movie myself. Even worse, I was with Josh who I should be mentoring and keeping from trash like this, but in reality, it’s not something we haven’t seen or heard, it’s just that it’s not something that you want your kids to ever see or hear and so the horror of it wasn’t that I was watching it with 23 yr. old world savvy Josh, but that teens would be watching this movie and laughing hysterically about a movie that had no single redeeming quality. The entire film is about sex and the various forms of sex and the quantity and multiple partners of which someone should be having sex with.

Soooo…. don’t go see it. It’s actually worse than Grindhouse – not as hard on the stomach or the eyes, but the ears… my dear word will they ever be clean again? I think not.

 On an upnote… tonight I have date #3 with Mary… We’re going to dinner with some old friends of mine – there will be 7 adults and 3 kids and so I don’t even know if you can call this a date – this is really in the “dating” realm of things. We seem to be moving along swimmingly as they say.

By Evan Stark

Eddie Renz is an avid fan of Egyptology, Wilbur Smith and bacon. Not a fan of humility but often finds himself humbled when he is around people who understand numbers like the Fibonacci sequence and Pi.

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