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Beyonce is not involved…

but I am getting upgraded. (click on the title for a fun “SIMS” version of Beyonce’s Upgrade U video) I’ve got a new Dell D620 sitting on my desk and I am currently moving all of my files to it. My super cool boss let me upgrade and if he wants to win boss of the year, then he will let me get Adobe Creative Suite 3 and Macromedia Studio 8. All the cool kids have them and you know me, I’ve got to be cool.

On to my weekend…

Did you watch the Superbowl? If you did then you were probably disappointed by the half-time show. I like Prince, but the show was just okay and Prince, unfortunately, is so 1983. Musically gifted, but still a little freakish I felt that the performance was lackluster and the Aunt Jemima black “do-rag” on his head was a bit much even for a pop superstar. Only Tupac could pull off the Aunt Jemima look and see where that got him? Yep, he’s dead. Some say it was gang related but I heard it was an accidental shooting by the fashion police. (snark)

The Colts did win the Superbowl and yes, Tony Dungy, the first black Coach to win the Superbowl was of course elated. However, I wish that race still wasn’t an issue. It is, but I wish that it wasn’t, and it probably will be until Christ returns or the world implodes on itself.

Speaking of imploding, I almost exploded from all of the food I consumed at the Miller’s house. We had excellent queso, bean dip, hot wings, tacos, fresh homemade salsa, caramel brownies with vanilla bean ice cream and we washed it all down with high octane Dr. Pepper. Of course over-indulgence has it’s price and this 3 hour heaven was followed by a 2 hour hell. I’ve often wondered how it is possible for the human stomach to expand in such a way that a person can consume half of their body weight. It is as if the stomach is a trash compactor of sorts and it has this amazing ability to smonch down everything we have eaten while we are eating it, but then in order to process it, it must expand it to 3 times its original size and therein lies the problem and the pain.

In an effort to counter-balance my excess I did play 2 hours of racquetball and ultimate frisbee over the weekend and so that helped some I am sure. But in reality I should have did all of that exercise and watched what I ate – but who does that?

So this morning I checked myself in the mirror and I decided to convert to Buddhism. I have already been working at putting myself in a ZEN state at night due to the fact that my neighbors are so noisy. I picture myself in an ethereal world far far away where there is no sound, only silence. Silence so deep that it is black and the blackness is so thick that it immediatly induces sleep. In this realm, I am one with the universe and I am so at peace with my inner self that Deepak Chopra and Ghandi would be impressed. Also, I have a nice Buddha belly already and so it’s an easy transition.

Namaste,

Eddo

By Evan Stark

Eddie Renz is an avid fan of Egyptology, Wilbur Smith and bacon. Not a fan of humility but often finds himself humbled when he is around people who understand numbers like the Fibonacci sequence and Pi.

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