My dad used to chase us around the house and tickle us until we nearly died. I can still feel his hands on my ribs. I remember the way they would dig into my sides and as I would try to resist he would move his hands from my side and then tickle me under my neck. When my dad wasn’t tickling us my mom would pick up the slack. They would hold us on the floor and tickle us and we would beg them to stop. I think my parents thought we were really big toys and often times they treated us as such, but we liked it.
Through the years my parents made lots of mistakes when raising us, but all parents do. There is no manual out there for parenting. There isn’t a guide that says if you raise your kids with these 8 simple steps they will turn out perfect. Nope. Instead your kids will take everything that you tried to teach them and then toss it out the window and maybe they will remember some of what you taught them, but mostly they will want to learn and find out for themselves.
When you are young you want to touch the fire, it is pretty. You need to know what it is like to get burned. Some people learn quickly from their mistakes, others build up a callous and no longer realize that they are hurting themselves – but once again, this is not the parents fault. Everyone must go and make their own choices in life. You must choose for you. Yes, your parents may have beaten you or abused you(my parents did neither), but when you get older it is time to put the past behind you. Don’t focus on the negative and remember the laughter. Remember the good times. Remember your mother running her fingers through your hair and singing you to sleep at night. Remember your dad trying his best to teach you things that he thought you needed to learn in order to be successful in life.
The older I get the more I realize that focusing on the negative only hurts me. Regretting the past will not help me have a better future. Blaming someone my current circumstances will not solve my problems and will rarely make me feel better. It is time to look inward and to start dealing with myself instead of looking externally for the reasons for why I am the way that I am.
I write a lot on this website about change and my past. I sometimes write about happy things or God or my family, but what I write I always try to write from my heart and I hope that it isn’t just inane drivel. I want my readers to actually learn something when they come to posted note and if you leave a comment, I learn something too.
Stay in School and Just Say No!