Austin – Been there, Done that.

Our troop departed from Denton at 2000 hours and made our way down 35W bearing in the southern direction at 36 longitude and 856 latitude.

Our Ford 250 was fully stocked and loaded and we were ready for some serious partying in Austin. We did not have any homemade acid since Albertson’s was out of powdered bleach but fate has a way of keeping things in balance. We were barely on the road for 20 minutes when suddenly our trusty Ford flew off the road and into a large marijuana field and ignited the field on fire. Smoke billowed around us and instead of fleeing for safety we all inhaled deeply and got so stoned that we finally called 911 and asked them to come and help us and to please bring along 3 large pizzas.

Back on the road again after this momemtary set back we found that we no longer had our map with us and so we prayed to God in heaven to help us make our way to Austin and he obliged by giving us a pillar of cloud to follow by day and a pillar of fire by night. As a way of showing God our thankfulness we all decided to change our names to Biblical names for the entire weekend. We became Zephaniah, Malachi, and Habakuk. We farkled (rock, paper, scissors) for the name of Malachi since it was the coolest and Cody ended up winning the coveted sobriquet.

We arrived at the late hour of 1200 and we were all pleasantly surprised to find that our apartment/condo/flat was extremely post-modern deconstructionist neo-classical in design and therefore it suited us comfortably and fashionably.

Friday found us sleeping in and breakfasting late. We were directed to Kerby Lane for breakfast and found their fare to be more than appetizing. I was so lost in the goodness of my food that I misdirected my passion toward the waitress and had to be escorted from the building in handcuffs.

After a long discussion with the police I was finally released and so we made our way to the Capitol building. I was so overcome by Austin and its overall hippie feel that I decided that just for the weekend I would give up my Hebrew name Habakuk and change it to Dew Drop. I also made Dumas pull over so I could grab a tie-dyed t-shirt and a corn cob pipe.

We took plenty of pictures of our wonderful State Capitol and then that night we went to eat dinner at a place called “Waterloo”. Famous for their record selling I personally think they should have stuck with records and left the food and restaurant industry to those proprietors that know what they are doing in the kitchen. My food was yuck, but we still had a good time because I got into a fight with the smug waiter that wanted to only give me a 10% discount on my food. Before it was over with I ended up deep fried and battered like an over-sized onion ring but you should have seen the other guy.

Saturday started out lazily as the rain fell down in buckets and made for a wonderfully blissful sleep. After we breakfasted we went kayaking on the Colorado River where I got many a blister on my hands from rowing like a mad man. Cody and Dumas decided to try to out run me numerous times, but in the end I caught them and I force fed them to a large snapping turtle. (okay, not really, but I wanted to)

Late Saturday night we went to eat Noodles and party on Sixth Street. I shook my money maker more than once and had a great time. Sixth Street is cool – the streets are full of people after midnight and they eventually had to shut them down.

The trip went really well and part of this story I embellished here and there, but only a little bit.

Dumas, Cody, and I had a great trip and you can see all the photos here:

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